Fuck you I wanted that fabulous flaming homo to win american idol...its like we lost the gay marriage vote...again
nothing screams I HAVE A PROBLEM! like the case of miller lite sitting on top of my DUI papers in the passenger seat of my car. lol
the only thing i remember last nigh is talking to some chick for thirty minutes about cheese.
Sorry for scaring your son with my drunken animal impressions
No that's sign language, not a drinking game. I tried to join
just tried googling 24 hr taco bell and when i typed "24 hour" it autocompleted with fitness. buzzzz killllll
we need to drink more beer. the fridge wont close.
It's like she can't drink without using a flambongo
Maybe he'll be famous someday and I can forget that anything embarrassing may have happened and just say that I fucked that famous guy.
So the next three days will be henceforth known as the 'celebration of the end of the most irresponsible years of my life' be prepared to wake up naked in a ditch.
I know you're my sister, but I'm pretty sure I'm going to have sex with one of your exes this weekend. He's probably not gay, but I'll let you know.
I just remembered that we had an in-depth conversation about how it was too stressful to wear pants.
Last time I was your wingman I had to deal with a girl whose only interest in my body was to clip my toenails. I'm not interested.
summer in europe = liver of steel
I accept that challenge.
She told me to take deeps breaths and I said I said YOU FUCKING TAKE A BREATH CAROL IM SURE IF YOU WERE IN MY POSITION YOU WOULD HAVE OFFED YOURSELF ALREADY and she said my name is Becky 😂
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