just told my prof that "i dont give a fuck" about the final. nothing like a having a signed employment contract already
Nick just found a baggie of 3 year old shrooms in his desk drawer and downed it all with cheap white wine. I am not on vomit duty tonight.
I came downstairs to find I had missed the 3some on my kitchen floor but not the pukefest or ER trip after it. This is what happens when the voice of reason is otherwise occupied
Sex tent. say it aloud its amazing. promise you we rnt stoned.
No fireworks. Throwing the old microwave off the deck.
totally just got a week extension on my midterm by telling my prof that I had just found out I was adopted
he kept saying that we were in ian's fun time place and then continued to act like a dinosaur.
"I'm gonna wax that ass" was the successful pick up line used on me last night. Clearly I had a few too many cause it worked..
im trying to look as sober as possible but i just poured orange juice and mayo into my milkshake.
jesus, I think that canada gold metal game has completely changed all rules of acceptable drinking habits, I was fucked untill noon and I just got invited to go party when I get off work...at 600am...and NO ONE understood why i was hesitant
Hypothetically speaking - is it bad if you get cut off at an airport bar at 11:30am?
So I just got motorboated by my grandma…
In other news, my ex fuck buddy is a surprisingly good wingman.
What part of I just want to watch porn, eat Taco Bell, and masturbate did you not understand?
Come on in. I'm butt naked, in the kitchen, eating ice pops
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