he then started listing things that have been up his butt, never drinking in boys town again
so we started it doggy style, but since we were really drunk kinda fell to the side and turned into a 'lazy dog'... my new favorite position btw
Just write off about 10000+ brain cells and 6 months of your lifespan.
Sounds like a normal friday night
He asked for a foot job. Whatever. I guess I'm swimming in new slut waters tonight.
I'm just learned what a rim job is, I feel like crying
As the cops are taking us away I see the strippers taking our DD backstage.
I might have pissed in the corner of someone's shed. They have nice lawn mower.
Every little girl dreams of the day when she picks up her fuck buddy because he's drunk at the gay bar again.
She deliberately backed into the homewrecker's whoremobile and yelled ""FOR SPARTA!"
My sweat smells like Wild Turkey. I'm really feeling the holiday spirit.
If he refers to me as slump buster one more fucking time.
I don't need this shit right now. I just woke up covered in pistachios
Would I do it again? Probably not but still,I don't regret a single ratchet thing I've done in college.
He drank an entire six pack, past out on the guest bed, woke up around 4AM, lifted & dropped my leg, then peed on the corner of the bed. When I told him where he was pissing he said "it's all the same babe."
Periods are much less exciting when you're not sexually active.
Randomize
