Note to self. Condoms are not microwavable.
That taco smell coming from your belly button was a huge turnoff
No, I stopped taking my meds because I like crazy me better
i just did the math...im a product of my mothers birthday sex
i robbed the continental breakfast last night
I need to find a more grown up way of dealin with a hangover at the office than pringles and mountain dew at 8:30 am...
The only funny part about this situation was this morning when they rounded up all the drunks in the ER, piled us into a minivan, then dropped us all off at our houses.
What are you doing and how can I add sex in there
so he had an ashton kutcher Kelso haircurt. dude, we're in our mid to late 20s, I don't think we can ridicule guys for having hair anymore.
I just ate cottage cheese and went to the gym at 6 this morning...the things i'll do because I might get naked in front of a new boy
Pregnancy test = positive. Hope you still have our old guess who game 'cause daddy elimination begins now.
Thanks for the bagel and the sex.
My arms in a cast, how am I supposed to have sex with only one hand?
more importantly I need two hands to eat pie
Fuck you i've put so many pretzels in her shirt
In this house, we have but one simple rule: DONT FUCKIN TOUCH MY STUFF OR I'LL CUT YOUR NECK IN UR SLEEP
Randomize
