I see an opportunity for you to use your nakedness to cure my boredom.
I have fifteen cents in cash and 80 cents in the bank. BUT I have weed.
Im beginning to think that if I ever write an autobiography it will have to be mostly fill in the blank.
I don't think there was a moment this weekend where grey goose did not course through my veins
My stomach is revolting cause i have put food in it and no alcohol.
I have no idea why I said that. I have no idea why anything happened last night, I broke my toaster making a egg. I'm going to quit drinking.
Well pretty sure I lost 3 of my best friends in one week. Remember when I said I wasn't sure if I was gonna be a better person or a more despicable one in 2012. Despicable wins.
also I woke up naked and covered in water but nobody can explain that part.
Lets have the type of night where its 5am and one of us has definitely punched someone who has been on a Disney Channel show.
I think I should just be a madame. Fuck it.
I'm just gonna post fliers on telephone poles like, "who wantsta be a hooooooe?!"
Just caught myself checking an online porn site while in a strip club. Might have a problem.
I took the pregnancy test for shits and giggles, but neither shits nor giggles were had.
I did not know male screamers existed until now. Good for him. Good for my ego.
I woke up at 6 and was laying at the top of my stairs.
It was like Lady and the Tramp, but just tramp and the tramp. And instead of spaghetti and meatballs, we had whiskey and cups
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