i have accomplished my summer goal of being able to relate to every taylor swift song
nothing as in nothinggggg kills the mood for me is when a girl with 4 cm nipple hair
It was like a drunk episode of Dora the Explorer. In English.
I think i'm just gonna start shot-gunning everything that comes in can form.
I negotiated the purchase of an entire tray of like 50 jello shots for $8.
He blow dried my hair while I sucked his dick. Now THAT'S fucking teamwork.
Dude give me 4 good reasons we shouldn't trade girlfriends tonight
Considering the last guy I had sex with was gay, this was a huge improvement.
oh god...if the people that live above me killed themselves again then im gonna assume im the worst neighbor ever
Thank god the bicycalist i hit was on drugs
I didn't want to have shaved for no reason, so I told him I'd blow him if he would just come over and appreciate the smoothness of my legs.
So he came on my stomach this morning and I totally forgot about it until after you poured that body shot.
If there's anything my liberal arts education has taught me, it's belligerence.
Your shirt... Was in my pants
For someone who claims to be straight, she knows a hell of a lot about bi erasure, and one Hayley Kiyoko song too many
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