I can only name 15 people I've had sex with - can I just start claiming that as my sex number?
i just know my balls have never hurt this bad before
he just invited me over for the 3 p's...pepsi pizza and porn...I'm gonna marry him
and i'm pretty sure he drank the lava lamp
seriously. next time...underwear. I'm not spending any other holiday season wondering if it'll be my last babyless one.
Solid. Can't put a price on good times
You can and it's called a liver.
Hey, is this going to be a real date, or am I just meeting you at a hotel to have sex in the bathroom? Given our history, I think it's a fair question.
You just wrote a check for drugs...pretty sure you don't have cash for beer..
I'm not saying I haven't been that drunk. I'm just saying I haven't been that drunk and then have cops buy me shots.
I could definitely fill a shot glass w my cum
please don't
I knew you were cut off when you tried to order a "Phil Collins"
Yes but I said "let's get a dog" not a drunk human so some rules will be established this evening
Also what’s the official rule on washing one guy’s jizz off my back before I go out with another guy? That I should?
I think I just shit out all my problems.
A massage should never include spaghetti sauce. shit was fucked up
Randomize
