he only lasted three minutes, so to spite him i stayed the night and slept in.
we've reached the level in our friendship where i don't think he would rape me
so tomorrow. i'm thinking coinstar then adderall?
i just made a girl do the walk of shame. as a bumblebee. i love halloween.
on the way home the dog started throwing up her bone in the car..so naturally i started to puke too
thanks for showing me a good time......and your penis a few times. Thanks especially for that.
Just saw ur booking photo. Love that u were already wearing orange. Its like u knew
Found a 10-can wizard staff hidden in our closet. Did we cut someone off?
That's yours. We cut you off.
I may be in the process of acquiring a second male fuck buddy and dating a girl....FUCKING STOP THE TRAIN I'M ON! THIS IS NOT A DRILL!!
Just gave my liver a good luck and I'm sorry speech
Pizza rolls are incredible. They are like sex, except I have them sometimes
Did you put Adderal in the fishtank in the lobby? The fish are acting like Olympic sprinters. Asshole.
I don't know how much expertise I could offer. My best advice is, "don't drown, for god's sake don't drown"
And he kept lifting up his shirt every few minutes to check if his nipples were still there
So I have three weeks to get rid of his girlfriend and fuck him senseless before he goes to jail
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