Someone sent me a drink from across the bar. It was water.
We had sex in the woods. It was great until some bird started mimicking my orgasm sounds
Now that world cup is done, funneling out of a vuvuzela has lost its fun
I am never taking advice from you again. The high heels in the shower were a bad idea. I orgasmed and almost drowned.
You claimed your dick was a divining rod, spun in a circle 3 times and walked into the bar you stopped in front of...consequently there was a bikini shoot going on
Hey, it's Thrasher! From the hospital!
I would totally lead with that as a line.'So, I was on Legends of the Hidden temple as a kid.. Your place or mine?'
We need to talk about the sailor moon porn. Do what you want in your room, but I don't want to come home to you cranking it on the couch to that.
Chose not to courtesy flush and the CEO huffed the result. I feel powerful.
But that's fine. Because I am an independent woman who is going to pull some jane Goodall shit and save the world one day......or be a porn star......either way they are going to wish they had fucked me.
I think I just did my first walk of shame. He sent me home with a watermelon from his farm. Southern one night stands.
I'm sorry you're hurting. Would a picture or my erect penis help?
Do you have feelings for this penis?
Honestly cannot tell if I’m magical or really, really high.
Either I'm getting old or the shit show is playing earlier than it used to...
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