what time did you get home last night?
SO late...when your in the lap of a 35 year old superstar you loose track of time
He said to me " i could be your father but i dont care"...it was so hott
So apparently I told him I was off to go "whore skipping" and I disappeared into the night skipping down the street. I know this because there's video.
Remember when the only STD we had to worry about were hickies? Those were the days
tiger just fucked it up for all of us...she grabbed my phone this morning and started asking questions.
these 2 russian guys walked past me and i got freaked out because i thought call of duty got real
he's 25, hott, and leaving for iraq tuesday, i wanna get in as much as possible...
your life is a nick sparks novel waiting to happen
yeah, it's no longer just 'day drinking' when it's 5pm and you're knocking over fruit displays at fresh market
seriously considering responding to a craigslist ad for a lesbian cunninlingus instructor...at this point i'm so desperate for a job that i'm willing to switch teams.
Like if a baby's bottom had nipples, that's how my boobs feel
I may be bringing home two guys tonight. I'f they won't go for a double-team you can have the lanky one.
He's not drinking on his 21st. Shooting vodka infused Nerf bullets at him would just make a mess and I don't want to be a creep and spike anything... I don't understand awkward boys
He is in my tree wearing full on scuba gear ... Get here asap.
I'm seeing how far I can grow my leg hair out before Jason will say anything. I'm up to an inch
I just wiped my butthole and there was glitter down there.
I regret nothing
Not even Married Dan?
I regret one thing
Randomize
