first missing my period. then crying at the clinic... but why?
we had sex 3 months ago. you missed your period 2 weeks ago. but nice try.
I can only masturbate in one position. It's very inconvenient.
so high driving around just saw a woman in a pink shirt chillin riding a horse
so high at work that a 35 year old with his kids handed me visine and winked at me. you win with the horse though
Just printed out my Plan B coupon at the library. Saving my own printer ink and paper as well as 10 dollars towards not being knocked up.
We've got 2 weeks of college left-I want to feel like Gary Busey by graduation.
Ummmm yeah ..,.. All three girlfriends I have right now are chatting with each other at the party...... I'll see you on the other side
i saw a stretcher and literally ran around for 10 minutes telling people it wasnt for me
The fact you even thought licking it would fix it boggles my mind
Well it worked
Not the point
at least the person I hooked up with donates to charity, the shirt I was wearing this morning was his relay for life shirt.
He may only be 25% black, but after that sexual experience I am 100% never going back.
I had to wash my hair with conditioner because my sister got hammered and gave the dog a 3am sprinkler bath with my shampoo.
I gave him morning sex, a bag of cookies, and dropped him off at work. I believe I deserve the "best hookup award."
Last night was just a whirlwind of Mario Brothers and sex.
Just realized that I bailed on you guys yesterday just so I could get wendy's. it was worth it but still, sorry
Also I like oatmeal more than sex.
Randomize