It's true. Ladies love me because I'm so strong and they feel safe. Not because of my pseudo charm and their impaired judgement after several drinks...
But, the reference to being horny and then blending a banana is troubling
i want to bang the Snorg tees girl.. shes always smiling ;)
winter break is gonna be like a weird mixture of rehab fat camp and holiday cheer.
Grandma was not a fan of the beer-can ornaments. Not "traditional".
Just found out my 21st birthday is on a Wednesday. The possibilities are cheap, as well as endless.
The port-a-pottys are knocked over so I have nowhere to sleep.
You need a Jiminy Cricket, but for sexual decisions.
We are smoking a hash blunt ... Bring your emergency inhaler
The effect you have on my penis from a different state is impressive
So I'm at that stage in my life where I am stalking my stalker just to get laid
Just beer bonged tequila, broke into the hotel next door and got chased by security. It's spring break
I'm pretty sure that my eyebrow is going to be swollen from a sex injury tomorrow and possibly a black eye. If it forms that way it wiil be the second time. Different eyeball. Different decade.
I threw up in the bathtub last night like a decent human being.
We had sex to Hey Arnold, Rugrats, and All That. I feel like my life has come full circle.
Randomize
