3rd rule of buttsex she must be clean and shower recently
and skipped dinner
It's not prostitution until you're out of college. Right now it's just strategic boning.
The more I stare at her and block out what she's actually saying with thoughts of what she could be saying, the more interested I become
that bitch in the red sedan is still teasing me with the ice cream cone. i'm going to show her my dick
All I saw was a purple blob and poking out from under was part of a green shirt. Took me a minute to realize it was him under that beast.Thought I should ask if he was actually breathing and conscience but then I saw him slowly exploring what few brave men have done before.
I feel like i just got chewed up and shit out by a ukranian midget
I think we've entered a low point in our relationship when I'm sending you pictures of pubic hair designs "because they're funny"
I almost took a picture but it looked like he might have a shank and I'm just not at a place in my life where I could handle having tetanus
I just wanna be able to fart and do my homework but he won't leave
National champion athletes like gay butt sex, too. I'm just here to help them out.
If you gave someone an std. would you say a muffin basket, a candy gram or an edible arrangement is a better choice to send them?
I’ve seen not one, but three Facebook articles on my feed today about “how to eat ass”. Idk what the universe is trying to tell me but it’s needs to chill
Never let the horse trainer ride you, always ride the horse trainer. I have huge bruises on my thighs from his hip bones. That's how hard he rode me
I'm a teacher who's always telling kids about the importance of due diligence, yet I'm eating an avocado out of a coffee filter because I'm too lazy to wash dishes
because nothing says “let’s fucking rage” like getting a compensation letter and some company stock
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