Say my name once during sex just to fuck with her. Like when it gets rough.
i'd rather walk the sahara in a snuggie with no water than take a bicycle cab
I have the worst wedgie. Seriously. Its horible. And there are people everywhere around me.
Slide your hand down the back of your pants and shift to the side slowly
...are you coming on to me?
everyone made a circle around them and startd chanting fight fight. they wernt fighting, they were dry humping
thats the last time i clean cum out of my retainer.
I can't belive they dont sell booze Sunday mornings. I mean some of us have to work
i find it sad that i can no longer sit in the back of class for fear that someone will fart into the heater again.
Only your vagina holds the key to what happened last night.
we kept pushing you at the prospective students saying go for it, itll make them want to come here
you kept yelling THIS ONES FOR THE ADMISSIONS OFFICE and then youd go in for the kill
You're not stopping till I see you on the ground trying to hold on to shit
I want you to know that the guy who peed in your bed got fat.
you were holding her above your head singing Circle of Life in what i assume was a Simba reference. then she smacked her head on a bar light and the bouncers kicked you out
This snow needs to melt so I can get wasted on someones front lawn
Just found out I made out with the 40 year old Captain of the boat at the barge party. On the bright side he let me drive the boat so at least there's that.
Ughh I think I'll just sit here in the dark and wallow in self-pity while drinking wine and knitting scarves for my future cats.
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