just come out here and I will go home with you...
4 maple syrup blunts. Decided to sit on my roof and count the snowflakes that landed on my tongue. 84.
We hung out in the bathroom the whole time and talked about sex and watched some girl pee. If you don't believe I was there, check the bathtub for bread crust.
She gives me Chlamydia and somehow I'm still the asshole
you came here, splled a bunch of margaritas, hung up a picture of yourself and then left
High enough to ask the woman at best buy if she ever feels like she's swimming. and telling the man outside that he smells like happy juice.
We don't watch enough power rangers
She needs more friends. Or a second therapist.
Currently putting together my outfit for this weekend, AKA a poster board that says "I'll cook you breakfast and do all your laundry, take me home." On front and back
I'm just checking to make sure you don't want to go to the farmers market... This is an assumption based on the fact that you were slapped with a sandwich last night and you remained unconscious.
We're eating jello shots in the library. I love the day after Valentine's
Got drunk in Atlantic City Flagged down some guy with two wrapped tampons like road flares for a cigarette.
I feel kind of like we’re in a gang and tonight is one of those “people are gonna know not to fuck with us” type of nights. And then tomorrow I am going to learn to pole dance. I’m not really sure how I got to this point in my life… but I like it.
I hate csi yet I find myself watching a full marathon. I am also eating hotdog buns stuffed with barbecue chips and they are quite tasty
You spent twenty minutes waxing poetic about her ass and her thighs
Randomize
