Michelle Duggar likes to fuuuuck
I left when they started reinacting what appeared to be a jerry springer episode
Life lesson. Learning to pee left handed is easier than learning brickbreaker left handed. Rather lose a few drops than a few lives
Also we decided you're the person whose going to die at my bachelor party...do the math you're the most logical choice
If you're going to outback I'll have to decline, I've slept with a large enough portion of their staff already.
you don't know what its like to have your bartender tell you that you owe him beer money infront of your mother at 3pm on a tuesday
I also think about what hot dudes penises are gonna look like when theyre 80 and it's not pretty
We can put you in charge of something
I can be in charge of being more wasted than anyone there so everyone feels comfortable being ridiculous
took over 12 bombs tonight and we still aren't hooking up. Wait how am I functioning
I am in an eBay bidding war over a build a bear one direction tshirt, this is who you choose to bone
I just accidentally deep throated a popsicle in front of my parents
fuck emotions I should've gotten more cats
this makes me concerned. not enough to actually do anything about it, but yeah.
Remember when you brought a guy home from the bar... to our parents house.... on thanksgiving eve?
My sister can't give you a handjob and us still be bros.
Randomize
