what happened last night??
everyone saw ******'s vagina
and that's just the beginning
i realized my work ethic and productivity really improves if i masturbate on my lunch break.
I am now Facebook friends with Donkey Lips from Salute Your Shorts
I didn't know it was possible to throw up mid-sneeze.
She just sat there, all alone, with a bottle of booze. And the dog. He even looked like he didn't wanna be there with her.
I've never played a more sexually-tense game of Uno in my life.
i don't think i ever formally apologized for that time i threw up on your dog.... well...here it is...
Is it mean that I just sent him a pic of my tits with the header, "say bye bye?"
Sorry there's no emoticon for I got my period all over a guy's bed so I had to improvise. There isn't even a bed one
Dude if I call tonight please answer and just say "NO, dont do it."
BAT SHIT CRAZY
It's you're fault, even though I never called
Aaand now my client contact has seen your boobs.
He rubbed aloe on my sunburn while I blew him... could he be anymore perfect?
Only time and a comprehensive case study of all of your relationships will tell.
Just for the record, I did not have sex in your bed. Happy 4th of July.
I just made myself orgasm twice and Laura lee hit 4 million subscribers. It’s a good day everywhere
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