Is it sad that I'm on the stopduiaz.com website and there is a cute boy but it will never work between us because hes in jail for 17.5 years?
Um.. is it mean if I say yes?
How would my first penpal letter even go? "Hey saw you on stopduiaz.com, sucks you killed that motorcyclist. Whats your favorite thing to do on the weekend?"
sleeping like a two year old who chased ambien with a bottle of whiskey.
i just shit on the floor of my room. my roommate was in the bathroom, my choices were limited.
He took naked pictures of me and told me if I ever got to the Disney Channel level of fame he would help me out. I think i'm in love
Bitches at mcdonalds acting like they never seen a girl puke in her own coat pocket before
I'm having flashbacks from last night. Did I admit to pausing Whitney's funeral because I was watching porn? I believe I did.
No, she isn't nearly as crazy as the girl who wanted to wear a vial of my semen as a necklace.
Russians do not operate on the same level as the rest of us. hoping I wake up tomorrow
WHEN DID YOU SAY YOU COME BACK BC I GOT INVITED TO A KEG WAR PARTY
Dude, I'm pretty sure I slept with my TA's girlfriend
Made up a full house drinking game
On my way.
I consider my hand a solid 5. So if I'm dipping below a 7.5, I might as well go with old faithful.
UHG. i just want to have hot lesbian sex and eat pizza with you.
Idk. The bad part of me thinks it's a good idea. The bad part is also the stupid part.
I'm going to need you to stop harassing my professor on Twitter when you're drunk.
Randomize
