I'm not going to fuck him in his Honda Fit. That's gay.
You can't see him, he's in front of the dildo, but Amelia Earhart is blocking your view.
What are the signs of a concussion? Please don't freak out.
Chasing tequila with honey. Ill let you know how it turns out.
She had another shot and asked if I wanted to taste her tongue ring. Then I helped her pee.
I have a meeting at work in an hour, I'm so hungover going outside is NOT happening there are roads and shit I'll totally get myself killed.
i can't understand anything he's saying. But he spells alcohol right everytime so i deciphered it.
You know its been a rough night when for a large portion of the evening you have accepted your death
I already googled the effects of Molly with my antibiotics, I should be fine.
Why is there even a knowledge base for that?!
I sleep texted my mom and asked her for a condom last night
this night may include but is not limited to : police encounters, wild animals, stomach pumping, and waking up in a field
I don't remember how I broke my nose last night, but I woke up with dried blood everywhere. Also, you should tell that guy how you feel.
We started off talking about nice cuddling and you turned it into fucking with a Santa hat on...
So someone just asked us for our kidneys?!?
Yeah. Broke it off. Saw her cheating after she forgot to turn her zoom off. Ring=$$$. Not making that mistake-priceless
Randomize
