i guess it's bad bediquette to quote the kool aid man
?
he said oh yeah and i responded with OHH YEAHHHHH!
I just realized that I've become that person they make the alcohol warnings on medicine for.
Someone obviously heard us on their way to class. They stopped at my door and started singing afternoon delight.
Sandwiches are there for you when porn isn't.
Couldn't see or hear that well because she hit me on the back of the head with a bat. That is my excuse. Also the gin.
I recommend just blowing him. It's always the way to go.
When he wears his hair down and sandals, he looks like Jesus. A Jesus I would fuck.
That's not what Jesus is for
New drink: empty coke can vodka water maple syrup. Get on my level
I don't want to ruin date night, but you have no idea how hard it is to poop whilst looking at cute puppies.
90 seconds of pumping and 2 months of bragging all summer. So much for my reputation here.
I feel like every man should aspire to get a blowjob from a sword swallower.
almost just sent your mom a dick pic. almost.
I FEEL LIKE HILARY MUST FEEL WHEN TRUMP MANSPLAINS AT HER
Ate 5 hotdogs today. You need to get me back on my tequila diet cause this shit has to stop!
"Here let me wipe my uterus off your dick" was probably the most unsexy thing said after period sex. I should get an award
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