You know how you thought that you put on a condom last weel?
yea
turns out that you did...and i just found it.
we've progressed from teabagging to lighting eachothers asses on fire. this cannot be a good path.
I like one night stands...theyre like crushes for big kids
he said he got tested two months ago... he goes with his whole family.
We stopped her at 12
12 shots? Or 12 midnight?
Which answer would freak you out less
Put you drinking hat aside for Tuesday. My buddy is bartending!
I just puked in my drinking hat.
We both paused during sex to do the clap during the Friends theme song. Soulmates.
I still have way too many Frat houses to get blackout drunk at before I'm get in any type of relationship
i keep seeing little orange spots im starting to freak out
you tried mixing adderall in your visine last night..
you can't tell me not to come to work cause roads are bad then ask me an hour later to come in and expect me to be sober
Yiu ever laugh so hard you stop breathing? Turns out weed -can- kill you.
Im wearing black today mourning the orgasm i couldn't get this morning :(
Woke up with a bed full of sand...care to explain?
Isnt is self explanatory?
You don't make any sense
TEQUILA
We have ur drink. Mom passed out in the bathroom. I'm goin to the other bathroom. Bs at the top of the stairs on way outside.
Randomize
