Gettin pulled over, can you watch my dog and pay the bils for a while?
I bet he comes in French.
Swine flu is the new snow day.
i'm transferring to degrassi. i don't care that it's severely canadian. classes are five minutes long, there's no actual work and you can get oot of class whenever you want to go have a dramatic scene with someone in the hall
i don't know where i am. i made bad decisions. i think this guy is dead.
$1 margaritas. This happy hour needs to end.
he laminated a picture of his dick.
FYI I just found your friend. Asleep. In. My. Kayak. In. Pool.
Sorry we couldn't "turn off the mirrors." How're you feeling today?
"You can go raw dog up in me". Exact words. I can't decide whether to run, or fuck. Help.
Say what you will, but only I can throw up on someone's door and make it look like art.
That's the last time I'm letting you drink that apple vodka
Your friend gave me you're number. I was the guy locked behind the book shelf.
I think you have the wrong number, but I hope you escaped your library-prison?
Well I've always wanted to get head while playing WoW...
K I'll do it, but mine is going to be WAY weirder. Your not allergic to shellfish, right?
He showed up to my apt at 6am wearing a suit and holding a bag of coke....how could I not let him in?
Dude my roommate just peed out the window
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