he called me "his little blueberry cunt muffin"...how would that make you feel?
I get free beer too. Its called a vagina and its accepted everywhere like visa
I got really high with eric & scott.. they're discussing why words sound the way they do.. it's going to get messy
As I was driving her home she congratulated each and every deer we saw for making it through the first day of dear season.
She just stuck her hand down the strippers pants. Shit just got real.
Slept in my car last night. It snowed. I peed on the street. �Hello 29...
I think I've had 45 beers today though So things are looking up.
get ready to load up the weird cannon and blow a load of buck-wildness all over the place people
We were so drunk that when I broke the bottom off a pint glass we decided to make it into a candle holder. How does that happen?!
Don't mind me. My boyfriend is carrying me because I'm broken not because I'm drunk.
It's not even 9:30 yet..
I feel like everyone in class can tell we had a threesome last weekend.
THE FASTEST WAY TO MY HEART IS THROUGH FAMILY SIZED BAGS OF GENERIC BRAND CHEESE BALLS
& he told me that I give the best head ever.. like can I get that on a medal?
Getting a UTI was SO NOT on my wishlist for the holidays
I did just chug a pint glass of wine during a solid round of masterbation, so I believe I am ready for bingo.
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