He asked what my name was on facebook chat. IT SAYS RIGHT THERE. i will never be drunk enough for this guy.
found her sleeping in the closet. woke her up and she said she was camping.
Wydf in so deruk i just dowwned a packet if salt waitibg for food at del taco
He's hungover and at the neighbour's garage sale negotiating a price for a tuba.
i turned my shower on this morning and passionfruit pulp came out. how did you even do that?
I don't know where I am and I feel like a hippo shat in my mouth. This sofa is comfy though.
Remember when I said "no boyfriend, no problems"? I lied. Tequila. Tequila is a problem.
Please never let me the drunk fat dancer in the bus girl
next time we make out at a concert please try to refrain from screaming out our hotel room number.. the amount of guys that knocked on our door after you passed out was ridiculous
Yeah sorry about that. I got pulled into the Russian student society's end of term party. There was too much vodka and eurodance to come help you pack.
I say camping because "let's go get hammered in the woods" sounds kinda fucking weird to be honest.
... Okay, fine. But I don't want to be a better person tonight. I'll be a better person tomorrow.
Can u pick up some lemons on the way? I have Tequila and a sore throat..I need them for both
I feel asleep with my contacts in, with my arms wrapped around a bottle of vodka. Also... Do we have class today?
He's a downgrade and it was quick. But it was dick nonetheless.
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