Can a clitoris grow tomatoes? Its symbolic and rhetorical.
Just made out with a pet sitter. His biz card says "even hamsters". Lowest point in my life.
dude. late night with jimmy fallon isnt even funny. the people in the audience there to see him dont even think hes funny.
kinda like you and your friends.
would it be inappropriate to describe you with the phrase "bigass titties"?
im not an educated person. i just do things. and it works out in my favor
No. I didn't know. I thought mid afternoon shots meant the day could only get better.
He threw up in a cup in the limo and when he got out the bouncer told him he couldn't bring drinks in so he gave the glass to that dumb girl we brought with us from c street.
I know, she tried to drink it
After the nose/jizz incident i think our relationship can handle anything.
OMG -- There are strippers in the bathroom crying because their power moves aren't good enough to win the competition
I'm sorry that running around town like a frenetic wombat trying to find you KY jelly isn't good enough for you.
I don't work there anymore. If they had Prince themed dildo parties i never would have quit
I'll probably just end up banging you in your parents marital bed,in their honor of course.
You were giving me all the reasons why being the big spoon is such a responsibility, and how you wish you were a girl cause the little spoon does nothing
Idk if I deserve a medal or a one way ticket to hell
How proud should I be that I googled "dildo with wheels" and actually got the result I wanted?
Randomize