Is it bad to mix sunny d with vodka if i dont have any real OJ?
I've mixd ketchup with vodka before and called it a bloody mary, so, no.
Do you need to be saved?
No I think I'm God
All i've done since I got back to my room today is take a three hour nap. Like, I even planned to change my pants and haven't even done that yet.
So it looks like you may be an uncle real soon. Don't ask how I feel about it and don't text me back.
I forgot to tell you thank you for putting me out when I was on fire. im sure I'll laught about this someday...
There were gay boys and a jukebox. It was like god wanted me to.
Its the anniversary of our epic NBA All-star game weekend. The night the two of us cashed a 30-pack while watching the dunk contest
Well be careful man. Be careful. Wear shoes in the house. Safety. Safety first, then teamwork.
I am at Brians in a pirate costume, what the hell am I thinking
somebody went from crying while watching Full House, to a full on emotional raging bull...I love this time of the month
I'm potentially being cockblocked by Old Man Winter. What the fuck did I do to piss off an entire season?
Just zoned back in to real life and found myself chanting "noodle eater noodle eater noodle eater" at my parrot as he devoured a single macaroni
Turns out he's just a recently divorced IT guy. Not a wizard.
We did blind alcohol taste testing and she got 10 of 10. I'm in love.
i realized my signature handshake has now become a hookup. i love what college has done to me.
Randomize
