And now his mom knows I was dipping my pen in company ink
xbox live and facebook are tricking me into believing I actually have an active social life
i'm sure there's a big cosmic reason for things working out the way they did. like, now you have awesome images to masturbate to.
I've been congratulating people on facebook about their forthcoming pregnancies. I can't wait to see how this plays out
You say "I'm in class" like it matters... I'm getting a little tired of having to smoke by myself at 4:20 because you're in class.
can you put a coffee maker in the dish washer? yo know what, nvm i want to be surprised
hes wearing the same tie today that i tied him up with last night.i wanna go home
Dude you missed it. This guy in the liquor store knocked over a whole display of 5 hour energy with his face.
Also I'm sitting home alone with a big ass bowl of marshmallows right now just eating. It's so sad.
Tried to figure out where I was without opening my eyes this morning for like twenty minutes. Not even close. Not even the right state.
He's German, so by default he gets to fuck me.
I was screaming out for people to gather the townsmen and the mayor so we could hang him
We've given up. My vagina is tired of constant lonely nights and disappointments. This is our retirement.
Idk if I should be worried or amused that my autocorrect changes the word STD to DTF.
Yea I went out in footie pajamas and still got laid. Good night for u?
Randomize
