my new favorite insult= "thundercunt"
WIFE SWAP. FAMILY OF MIDGETS. LIFETIME. NOW.
My roommate was eating ketchup out of a bowl. Get me the hell out of here.
what am i going to do when LOST is over? What am i going to get high to?
Last thing I remember was you straddling a guy in a wheelchair on the dance floor.
Forgot to mention...Pamela Anderson has HPV, so i feel like im in good company
His best friend walked in while we were banging, turned on the light, yelled BURN, grabbed his computer to play the Thunderstruck drinking game, turned off the light and left.
She kept telling the ambulance to sit down and then started crying when we told her it couldn't hear her
I was about to smoke a bunch of weed and lay naked while I cried all day
true friends will drive 3 hours to come smoke a couple blunts with you on the bridge where your car broke down
Nothing $200 worth of strippers and spicy fried chicken couldn't fix.
My butthole probably tastes like a Cinnabon right now
Yes but I said "let's get a dog" not a drunk human so some rules will be established this evening
Kids music just accidentally came on at this party. I didn't know how many stoners were here until they all sang along.
I'll be naked. By 11. Then arrested. Drunk tank adventures
Randomize
