Obv we're gonna bbm each other in bed
:O -> O: ... that's emoticon for "he threw up in my mouth while we were making out"
Even the bartender felt bad for me
k so who do I think I'm kidding applying to culinary school? I just fucked up a microwaveable pizza
once the "do it" chant starts, any shot at an even remotely dignified party experience is dead.
They have a guy from new zealand living under their stairs.. they don't charge him rent. He just buys food and booze and bartends their house parties.
I took my pants off in the cab and tried to bite his ear. Not going oout for awhile
Can you explain to me why I woke up with my hands tied to the hotel bed with the phone cord???
He wouldn't give me a cup of water for my bong so i sat in the drive thru to run up the timer until he gave it to me.
I ended up naked with smirnoff caps on my nipples. Dignity is now a completely foreign concept to me.
Question: If I got in a car accident and lost my memory of us, would you work your way back just so we could be fuck buddies again?
I'm watching The Vow and just need to know that I'm loved in some way
well his attempt to make a white russian with instant coffee, gone off milk, and that weird probably illegal vodka we bought the other day isnt going well
You had a fry stuck to your face... Every five mins you would wake up, take a bite, put it back then fall asleep again...
it doesn't matter what you do now, you will forever be known as the girl who fell off the roof
nooooo! we need to brain storm. I need rebranding....what if I start always showing up with my cat or a wacky hat?
try again roofio
I'm just going to use my debit card. I feel bad buying pizza with the money I stole from my roommate...so I'm going to put it in my piggy bank.
Randomize
