Yeah, where have you been?
Clearly not facebooking enough. Sweet jesus.
How did you manage that?
Told her it wasn't GENITAL herpes... just ORAL herpes... on my penis
lol... jersey girls rock
She looked kinda like Mario Batali?
after he came i started crying. just to fuck with his head.
This is so fucking sad. Netherlands isn't even a real country.
I have a question, if it paid really well, like ridiculously well, would you be a restaraunts under the table resident blowjob girl?
he stopped during sex, told me i smelled like McDonald's and went harder..
Eating nacho cheese off the carpet. How is your morning?
Of course it may just be the context. A dish of dog food would look lovely next to your breasts.
You were laying in a hotel bed drinking beer from a straw while you demanded everyone to kiss your foot tattoo.
At least they play good movies in the waiting room of the pregnancy resource center.
You kicked me our in the middle of a blizzard with a dead phone. I had to give my watch to a pizza delivery person to take me home. You owe me a gyro too.
Sorry this is taking so long. I'm looking for my dignity.
The people above me are fucking to Miley Cyrus
It was probably the most embarrassing moment of my life. But I had cleavage, so I'm good!
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