I used to have a blog that was basically all about ****** and all of his sexual misadventures
I mean it made tucker max look like a fucking alterboy
But unfortunatley his mom did a google search and found it
The dr is doing well, he randomly asked if I was bi
Dude, I would hit that so hard that whoever could pull me out would become the king of England
You brought back some girl with you at 3am and introduced her to everyone as "hot pocket"
You should really come over right now. There's hot construction workers across the street. I'm gonna go pour beer on myself in a bikini on the sidewalk. See you in 5?
Very nice. It looks like a Fisher-Price My First Dildo, but still very nice.
And he was super vague about his life, it was frustrating. I totally boned a homeless guy, didn't I?
He asked me if I wanted to play "Edouard Mandevan," turns out that's French for Edward Winehands
He bought a sex swing! He's building the playground of my dreams!!!!
God fucking bless the man who invented the vibrator. Bless him and all his descendants. I think I saw the face of God tonight
The smell of mosquito spray completely ruined the sex.
I think my teeth are moving, they feel like people.
I'm way too hungover for life right now
i just wanna know who wrote "dibbz" on my ass?
I forgot to bring soap and all I could find here was body wash. It's like bathing with laundry detergent.
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