Just applied online. Cant stop hiccupping. May be drunk. Hope they liked my smiley faces.
I love taking my adderall while im in class! As soon as I take the pill out everyone around me just stares in envy!
you don't seem to understand just how much pasta i spilled on my bed last night.
You mean the girl who was passed out face down on the bathroom floor until 10 AM? You're right, she was cute.
Woke up this morning with seven juice boxes under my pillow and an empty box of condoms In my pocket. Good night.
I feel like the only phrases I can clearly speak while drunk consist of: i'm fucking drunk, chug, and shots
Tomorrow is Have Sex and Climb A Mountain Day. We have amazing dates.
My phone broke again .... im not really sure how im going 2 explain the teeth marks to the ppl at the Verizon store
I yelled out look at all those hickeys. And then gave her boyfriend a high five
I swear to god if I see a single piece of genitalia I'm driving back to LI and smacking you back to the Italian Renaissance
You've never really lived until you tell someone you have an STD over snap chat.
Still drunk on my morning "run" which has turned into a walk. Just burped fireball
He also deemed that the fact that I couldn't log into Netflix was not an emergency. He's wrong.
gonna stay in tonight
and im a platypus. shotgun a beer and get your dick to this party. ive got some hot friends visiting
I'm pretty sure he sprained my clit...
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