you know you are hungover when... you set your alarm for the next time you think you are going to throw up
I'm pretty sure my roommate has taken plan B more times than i've had sex. Not sure how that makes me feel.
I love the progression of these pictures. I go from cute to Courtney Love
it was a sick party until you insisted on putting on "that's how I beat shaq"
Buying $100 worth of beef jerkey sounded like a terrific idea last night.
saturday- my day is open, my legs are not. you in?
well apparently not.
just remind me when i get fired soon that august is the month i started pregaming work
so does the 200 for rent and 150 for utilities include the never telling my boyfriend about the guys i bring home.. or is that extra?
Oh thank the gods of upholstery, i thought that was never coming out...
Everyone should know the rule that if your dicks touch during a threeway you just make lightsaber noises and move on.
I will rip it off your body in ways are socially offensive but you still kind of like.
You know that girl that climbed through my window and got in my bed with me and fucked me? It turns out she was real and has a real boyfriend who is real pissed
I'm talking to this guy I met online about French toast. I am the oddest fucking combination of hungry and horny. Wtf brain.
You know what sucks about being drunk at 4 pm? Not a god damn thing.
I woke up next to a Big Mac box.. And had no sheets or clothes on. The night was a success I think.
Randomize
