I no longer want to be the gay that plays in the revolving door at RelationshipDale's like a seven year old with a.d.d.
sitting in room practicing taking shots. has my life come to this?
New plan: we get a little bit drunk and go to 24 hour fitness and be eachothers wing people so we can hit on in shape hot people at a gym instead of drunk idiots at a bar.
Just drive me around campus, I will be able to smell their innocence.
The last good decent convo we has was when I was trying to convince you to let me watch you pee.
Once two people had broken bones it had become a bulk hospital trip so we took the party bus
I have her designated blowjob hair tie on my wrist. It's like a key to eternal happiness
She sat on the toilet backwards so that she could hold onto the back part for balance. No she's not ready to go home.
Well you know it's going to be an interesting night when the bathroom attendant is doing hail marrys
I'm using toast as a chaser. If I wasn't already so fucked up this would be revolting.
Remember the bouncer that knocked out Dave and Sam? Apparently his day job is a florist. Uppercut and fresh cut in one package.
Theyll love you, its bunch of older ladies who drink whisky and sours and talk about the sex seans in Game of Throwns
then he told me my boobs feel like "if you put mushroom soup in a baggie." I don't know how I'm supposed to feel about this.
He stood next to me peeing as I was puking behind a car in the parking lot, telling me how much he loved me. On the other hand, he loves me!
He started planning our future mid-hookup. You tell me how my night was.
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