I've decided that life's journeys are more fun when your moral compass hangs in front of you and swings with each step
Im starting to realize why people dont masturbate while driving
when did my "fat clothes" just become my clothes...diet starts tomorrow
in my drunkeness I still was able to plan for the morning. I duck taped my keys, a water bottle full of mimosa and my cell phone to the front door.
You should offer shots at parent teacher conferences..I bet more ppl come
and you stopped teaching...why?
how does 'resolution to respect myself more' follow 'he fucks me really hard'?
Okay I know I said I was going to quit drinking for a while but apparently pumpkin pie flavored vodka is a thing and I will not rest until I have some.
MASS TEXT: Lets start a new tradition. Black Friday log pic contest. I'm waiting.
We are gonna sacrifice to and pray to every god in this world that he doesn't find out about her sleeping with his old roommate.
I'm right down the road from AJ's old house and I'm getting mixed feelings. My vagina is remembering good dick. But the rest of me is remembering horrible times.
I gave the bike taxi guy a blowjob because I didn't have any cash. College.
At leat we can cross off 'having sex in a classroom' on our bucket list.
I could not add him. He gets 5 likes on Instagram.
Can you recommend a quality dick? I haven’t had a good sexing in a while
I'm at the fucking ritz Carlton and I would leave here to cuddle with her. Not even fuck, just cuddle. What th hell is wrong with me?
I think it's called love, bro
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