and when i put it inside her she yelled "welcome aboard!"
Are you trying to threaten my boobs?
We woke up in an inflatable kiddie pool full of both empty and full beer cans. In the middle of his dad's office. Oh, and we were locked in. Nobody remembers.
do you think semen can infect my impacted wisdom tooth
Apparently blowing a .28 for a cop and then kissing her on the mouth is technically assaulting a police officer. Who knew.
She was moaning so loud as i walked out of the room her roommates gave me a standing ovation... i think they are next
i am bringing shame upon my ancesors with my weak liver valhalla will never accept me
Such a good question, let's ask the alcohol gods for the answer.
I'm petty sure you said "hold on let me make my nipples hard, they look better"
My vagina feels like it's been kissed by angels.
I just got my evaluation. My manager told me he hated my guts and pretty much wanted to stab me in the face. Then he gave me an "exceeds expectations" on pretty much everything and a raise.
I WANT PIZZA BUT I ALSO WANT SELF ESTEEM
BUT LIKE WHO AM I TO EVER CARE ABOUT SELF ESTEEM
We are gonna have a bake sale and the preceded will go towards the abortion
I was just informed that I asked for a glass of wine at the police station
I'm sure it would have gone very well with the cigarette you lit there.
I have more important things to worry about than you drowning your cheerios in tequila.
Randomize