one word: firstdatebathroomanal
I got my nipple pierced! I love it so much!
Well, there goes breastfeeding.
since we're both too lazy to go to each others house, you drink there, i'll drink here and we'll skype. it's the same thing.
It hurts to peel the glue off my chest and i keep finding glitter in my hair.
I just wanted to decorate you...
Monday morning margarita madness at ny house. Yes before wheel of fortune. Yes day drinking.
Power went out. She lit a candle and gave me head. Made some pretty impressive candlelight cocksucking shadowpuppets. Must be what porn was like in olden times.
He's moaning and crying and coughing up something audibly liquid. I can't live in this house any more.
He is into some weird shit i walked in his room last night he was waving his hard dick around hitting shit yellin cock fight
I just tried to roll over and fell off the bed. I think that is the beds way of kicking me out
I just puked in my courtyard and dripped toothpaste in my chest hair. You better be getting laid or this drunk is wasted.
with great strapon comes great responsibility.
I got really adventurous too. Like. Balls in the mouth adventurous.
I asked for a cup of water. They gave me tequila. They WANT ME TO DIE
Went to my bottom drawer for my stash , gone just a note says thanks sucker love dad
And the you walked in and said to the only under age dude "IM NOT SLEEPING WITH YOU TONIGHT!!!" You may not have high standards but thanks for not sleeping with my brother!
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