Where are you?
In a non slutty way
you announced to everyone at the bar "fuck girls. they're confusing. im gonna start having sex with boys now"
so the party was at my house but some how i ended up being the only one who slept outside
I brought him to this party even though we're not together anymore because we made a bet on who would have sex first, and it is a sausage fest up in here.
I was galloping around pretending to give birth to pbrs. I could have used a mask.
You climbed out your own window and walked in the front door..
Now that I've quit blow, I think I'm allergic to my cat....
He said he could outsmoke me so I challenged him to a weed duel. I don't always very competitive but when I do...
She told me the only rule was that I couldn't cum on her Batman blanket.
I hear jingle bells and I can't tell if it's bc I'm feeling festive or just REALLY high
We aren't doing Shrooms tonight bc that would be friendship cheating on you
My mom's yelling at me for being a whore and my dad's quizzing me on how to drive in winter weather....I'm home!
I think I may have just hit a new slutty low! ..... Just purchased the Costco pack of condoms... $9.99/48 pack = amazing deal! The judgement when I bust out the value pack = priceless!!!
Hot guy next to me on the flight lives near my grandparents. There’s a 100% chance I end up drunk and naked in his hot tub
Happy Thanksgiving to me!!!
My sister gave me satin sheets. We can fuck on satin sheets.
Randomize
