Billy Mays died!
I know. And the US is beating brazil...what's wrong with the world?
He's pole dancing on a heat lamp.
well after this past weeked you can expect to see me on maury playing a little game called "who's the father"
ah. the first shower back home is like a baptism from the sins of the past year
Stop making excuses. You can be here in 5 and cumming in 10
he woke up with $200 in his pocket and had to buy his cell phone back from a hobo at the bus stop.
I called him daddy. To his face. Somewhat sober. What more could I do?
Maybe I'll just get really drunk on valentines day and tell him I think his penis is small
Haha, apparently they frown upon male strippers there. Bouncers couldn't catch me tho.
My penis needs a shock collar
I tried to twerk on a barn in 3 inch heels at a party last night and nose dived into mud. These were all new friends. I'm probably not allowed back. Cool.
The zombie version of you bit my friend's hand. No more zombie crawl for you. Not ever.
masturbating on the freeway is more stressful than it sounds
I got sprayed in the face with titty milk and I'm still so traumatized
Is 6 weeks really a benchmark now?
Ask me in 6 more weeks, when they're in a bisexual polycule.
Randomize
