before i could say "i'm not that kind of girl", i was.
after we finished he farted and said 'i've been holding that one in'
i just made my gag reflex go away.
champagne bombs. Yes, i think that is where things may have gotten out of control.
the nurse was shocked when I handed her a cup of green piss. what did she expect giving me a drug test on st. patty's day?
you made a powerpoint titled 'things i've drank tonight' and emailed it to me.
I'm on my fifth double. This night is getting better whether it likes it or not.
He knows as soon as he hits chameleon eye status drunk, he is guaranteed to piss the bed we NEED to push him there
Currently playing beer pong versus the girl i lost my virginity to.....and her mom
I based a lot of our friendship on the fact that I thought you were crying from feeling so sad for me when I got crabs. I'm not sure if we can ever be as close now.
I basically have the attention span of a ferret on meth when it comes to men
I just want some dick and chicken fingers please advise
what do you mean i can't make cookies with a blow dryer? challenge accepted.
well apparently i sat in the bathroom staring in the toliet at my vomit. it was blue. how was your night?
I JUST WANT TO SIT IN MY UNDERWEAR AND WATCH THE BRAVES GAME AND NOT BE CONSTRAINED BY MY ED SHEERAN SHORTS
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