Getting food. Want anything?
Vagina. Double meat no buns. I have the secret sauce
He's telling me stories about how he made out with a 14 yr old when he was 22. I'm going home.
some girl had on jean underwear. i hate america.
walkin home..,.jsut saw the cheshire cat
watch out for the queen of hearts
fuucck i forgot ab her
Nothing quite says America like barbecue and beer at 9 in the morning.
apparently i saved myself a memo last night titled "cake" and all it says is "i love it so much"
Just ran four miles to popeye's. And back. Dedication.
We lost a condom inside me, I had to fish it out. The next day he gave me a Gone Fishin' bumper sticker. True love at its finest.
Things I want for my birthday 1. a Chipotle grade tortilla steamer 2. a new liver
And I just want to be like your tongue is not a FUCKING sword
Playing nyquil pong with a cat again
Let the record show that the first hour of my twenty-first was spent shooting tequila ans discussing the emotional integrity of werewolves.
Dude fuck drugs. It's 4am and I'm eating mushroom ravioli fantasizing about jumping on a trampoline
I've broken 3 vibrators in the past month because I apparently am "too rough" with them. Is that even possible?!
You've got the chocolate, drugs and my pants. You hold all the cards...
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