sorry i'm running a bit late. had to shave my brittney...was looking more like rapunzel. clearly i've been having a drought.
I am at The Loft in SoNo, and there are two girls within arms reach that are making out with each other AGGRESIVELY. Like I can see 100% of a boob
For future reference, this is Trevors little sisters phone now. Trevs number is 484 XXX XXXX. Great story tho
why is jon gosselin on the news 24/7 for dating some new lady?? how bout I get on msnbc for not getting laid since forever ago
She might as well just lie down with one of those red "Easy Buttons" next to her
that knocking you heard last night......that was her head slowly going through the wall
I could swear I did coke with Jesus last night
in my defence, i did try to get you to put your shirt back on, then you screamed at me to stop telling you what to do
I ended up in a bathroom giving my hymen a pep talk
Birthday are for suffering. TAke some tylenol pm and day-drink tomorrow
if youre gonna throw up it might as well taste like christmas :S
I had the bathroom of girls sing you happy birthday while you puked. I couldn't stop laughing. They were all so supportive
I just made a dick pic collage. Let me just tell you,there is no comparison to the latest!
I feel like I might be the only person I know who eats bundles of radishes in-between orgasms from their vibrator.
Have you ever had a pregnancy test laugh at you?
i think i'm just going to start having sex with his brother, he's much hotter and it would definately be less illegal.
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