you turned your livingroom into a bong?
I was so drunk I accidentally put in two tampons.
I tried to talk you out of it. You were worried about alcohol being a blood thinner.
Coming down off exstacy at a church event. Resisting the urge to dance to the church hymns.
I woke up around 30 bottles of beer, with a piece of aluminum foil in my hand, that had "you Win" Wrote in sharpie..
I had to use the resin knife to take the staples out of my tax return forms. Tax returns and a search warrant?
So my teacher figured out I made a drinking game out of her lecture. Once my drink was gone she let us out. Happy St. Patricks day class. Your welcome
just saw 2 fat kids fight for the last slice of pizza. Litteraly fight. God Bless America
Hey, did you take me to hospital last night?
Periouds do not concern me. Biploogival needs are buological needs.
Also while I am being the bigger person I plan on bringing over something strong smelling and/or alcoholic to torture the poor hungover bastard
stuck in a tree...bring a ladder. also my arm might be broken. no questions are allowed.
I'm pretty sure I'm the first person in the history of this college to rollerblade their walk of shame.
Just tapped my penis on the head and said "this will be your year buddy."
Interlocking vagina powers go!!'
Oh god, your drunk again aren't you?
Why would you ask him if you could lick his chest?
He has a very lickable chest
Randomize
