i wonder what megan fox's vagina feels like.
Heaven soaked bacon.
I'm at a Rock of Love themed party. New high? New low? I can't tell.
Wait. Scratch that. It's not themed. These girls are just sluts.
threw up in my backpack again. Asian guy I cheat from wasn't pleased.
he rolled over in his sleep, called me a hoe and then grabbed my crotch. some things never change, asleep or not.
I swear this girl is like a Cross between Danny Devito and Anne Heche....the Lesbian Years.
its not fair. if i was a guy, i'd be getting a high five for banging two in one night.
Shame should no longer be a word in your vocabulary.
We have a hundred jello shots. Lines will be crossed.
Showerbowl immediately followed by pullups naked. I feel like fucking Tarzan
I woke up naked dangling by my feet from the balcony over his foyer. He's officially my new favorite booty call.
Just because you graduated a semester early, doesn't mean you can take a semester off of drinking. Sorry.
Joined a porch party below me by climbing out the window and jumping off the roof. Tonight will be good
I don't remember, but I believe your goodnight phrase was "nice meeting you, thanks for not macing me"
It's 1pm, she's in the shower, I don't have the guts tell her I wasn't her blind date. Someone got stood up.
Well. I think my red tank top is jinxed. this is now the second time it's gotten jizz on it.
Randomize
