you never know when you'll meet the man of your dreams and bang him in an elevator
I had forgotten what it was like to go to all four classes. It's exhausting.
isnt it sad that we can reminisce about our childhood but we cant remember shit we did last month
Thank you for the breast cancer awareness themed circle of death. Had it been any other time I would not have played topless.
Drunk in my research methods class at 9:30 in the morning. We should do a quantitative analysis of my mimosa consumption.
I am both scared and jealous.
Yeah but then he looked at me bleeding on the floor, said oh i guess you need to go to the hospital now, and left
Someone fucked up, the stop Kony day is on 4/20,
How was the party? Lets put it this way: "He wants her dick" was a factual sentence stated last night.
she came back from her house with A paper cut , a 2liter of sprite with Bacardi , and half a mustache . we're inviting her more ofte
I was like can I please fuck your hips back into realignment
I guess I'll just chalk it up as a learning experience and a lot of great sex.
A man can only lie in bed watching COPS for so long before he wants to do things that can lead him to starring on the show.
I'm now consulting a magic eight ball on all major life decisions. On another note I think I have chlamydia.
I can still be you friend and be there for you. And sometimes get drunk and fuck you.
There will be plenty of opportunity for me to sexualize Mike via VenMo.
Randomize
