I found the seven page love letter I had written you. I'm sorry i was so obsessed.
so now that im really awake i see that my underwear are completely ripped down the side, my shorts are on backwards, i have to go get plan b....i call last night an epic fail or success depending on how catholic i am feeling
you don't remember? you called me at 330 crying because you were in the middle of having sex with corey and forgot his name. all you kept saying was i'm a drunk bitch.
enterprise is going to pick me up, im too high for this
His shirt was in the kitchen sink this morning, I'm pretty sure my roommates know.
I'm pretty sure you can't just waltz into a walk in clinic and ask them to de-baby you.
They both invited me to family dinner Sunday. Secretly dating two sisters just got real.
Say something like you want him to fuck you behind a McDonald's. Guys secretly love weird shit like that.
Your cum is still running out of me. I pity the next person that tries these jeans on....
also, the amount of semen in my carpet right now is unforgivable...
casual night just sitting in the kitchen at 2 am eating stale chips and hot sauce while my friends younger sister is cleaning all the blood off my body
Also, upon examining the photos, I have concluded that you were the sloppiest drunk girl of the night. And that's saying something considering Hurricane Jessica was in town.
if the furniture in my bedroom wasn't shape shifting... this would be a different story.
He said I could stop sending ass pics now and just say hello. I'm not sure if that means he's no longer interested, or that he's a gentleman??
Trying not to ruin Mother's Day with the enormous hickey on my neck. Nice.
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