As gay men are we obligated to learn the Single Ladies dance.
i couldnt tell she was wearing a bumpit until she started giving me head
The Rock is playing the tooth fairy. I can't believe I used to smell what that man was cooking
I'm looking at pot farms on google earth. Google should be proud I found a real purpose for it to serve.
His bond is $50,000..margarita Monday might get cancelled
good news. according to wikipedia, my blackout might just have been "post-trauma amnesia"
Well i'm not entirely sure considering he gave my vagina an early valentine's day card that said "you're purrfect."
Nobody knows who the hobo or dude who whipped out his balls is
Single person behavior: I wanted a cookie but was too lazy to make or go buy any, so I let cookie dough ice cream melt and ate all the chunks. Pantsless.
I threw up in the bar parking lot and yelled THIS IS MY FUTURE.
I will have you again some day my love. And our divorce will be magnificent
I was trying to remember why my knees hurt then I remembered I was twerking on the countertops.
I can't tell if you're talking about my pussy or Cape Cod.
I wish I was there so i could bitch slap his incredibly sexy face
Decisions were made. The quality of them will be judged tomorrow
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