Yo I'm just eating dinner now. U ready to go out?
Ya ya. Where you eating?
Cereal and beer. U kno u want in.
his mom called while we were having sex and asked if we could finish in his brothers room because her ceiling fan was about to fall on her bed
his extensive knowledge of the age of consent laws kinda scares me....
Come down. Bring Jorts. We're getting ready for this tricycle race like champions.
OPIZZABONMYDICK
I may be bringing home two guys tonight. I'f they won't go for a double-team you can have the lanky one.
Why wake up next to a guy when you can wake up next to a bag of chips and not have to worry about what kind of std you might've caught
he looked at me and said 'happiness is a warm blanket' then stole my vodka.
I told him I was going to sit on his face after I got out of the shower, he threw up the arm boners and yelled "STEVE HOLT!!" I might actually stop sleeping with other dudes.
Twice. I only peed my pants twice tonight.
Wow! It's so great to hear from you! We all thought you perished in Winepocalypse 2012, man.
It will pretty much be equal to the feeling I had when you let me hold your dick while you were peeing, or when I graduated high school!
just found the "let's take a picture before we do these roommates" before picture
thank god there was never an after picture.
excused from jury duty. THAT hungover...
We peed on a building I think...like a building in downtown...not out of view of anyone.
Randomize
