so i told her that taking semen on the face helps make your skin smoother.
and?
luckily she was drunk enough to believe she had really bad acne...
but i got with him after midnight so its technically 2 days
the cops didnt even say happy birthday to me :(
i fell off the bed in the middle of it, and he yelled "5 second rule" and kept fucking me. i think im in love
i dont think the girl sending me nudes is qualified to pass judgement on me
Yes, that's a picture of my balls. It isn't however an answer to my question.
you were wandering around the street for like an hour singing "nothing but socks on"..an original you wrote after the 12th shot i believe
Drunk me forgot I'm not an 18yr old raver anymore. Adult me is now in pain.
I misjudged the power of my pelvic thrusting capabilities. His nose is broken. Thoughts?
This day sucks. I just wanna play ostrich and bury my head in your boobs.
Nothing says "lifelong friendship" like FaceTiming in a sex shop.
Currently sitting in the movie theatre bathroom while she gives him a blowjob in the parking lot. Don't ever tell me I'm a bad friend.
How many more of your relationships do I have to destroy before you realize sleeping with me isn't a good idea?
ive started thanking my toys after masturbating. might be time to get some fuck boys
It's not a hangover, it's "slept on a couch with another person and said person moves a lot and is loud"
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