Five things that make you perfect. Go.
The skin of a dead hooker. The blood of the innocent. The soul of a kitten. The hat from cat in the hat. And sunglasses.
New pre-game routine....wal-mart bathrooms...quality beers for free...hallelujah
We always say that. And then its 4am and someone is screaming at strippers.
Sitting in a bubble bath with my bong, how's your morning?
and she is using the paper towels as a pillow... but you know what? i've done that too.. so u can really tell we are sisters.
All I remember is this kid kept saying that he has a dream that white kids and black kids can take shots together as one, and just we'd keep drinking to that.
you reached into a lemon drop to pull out a lemon of someone else's drink..
please don't fuck her on my bed i'm too poor for laundry quarters
Do the molecules within bourbon change when mixed with a cola to form a superior liquid treat?
I accidentally told my mom "the reason I didn't answer your call is because my phone was in my pants, on the floor"
I need a drink and a shade of lipstick that will put the fear of God in a man's heart.
I could drive to your house and kick you in the nuts right now....and not even stop for a burrito
I smoked then listened to a voicemail from my mom...I ended up yelling at my phone cause she wasn't answering me. Forgot it was a recording.
Well I've always wanted to get head while playing WoW...
K I'll do it, but mine is going to be WAY weirder. Your not allergic to shellfish, right?
It wasn't as awesome as they lead everyone to believe. No stripper. Ran out of booze. The chipmunk. He was real.
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